I HAVE CALLED YOU BY YOUR NAME AND YOU ARE MINE
Isaiah 43:1
How often are we identified by our profession, or by a spouse’s name or profession, or by our children’s name, our family’s name or in some instances, by the notoriety of another person or even people group. I have been Fred’s wife, Richard or Phillippe’s mum, so-and-so’s daughter or daughter-in-law. I have been the teacher, the pastor, the employee. I have been introduced just as my wife, my mum, my daughter, my friend and sister – I have born many titles and sometimes without my name ever having been mentioned. Assumptions have been made about me based on my gender and my ethnicity, as if all women or all South Africans or all New Zealanders or all Aussies think and act exactly the same. I have been expected to conform to the ways of my family, even though I have always been and will always be a little bit outside that box.
I guess, where it comes to being part of the Church, in many respects, I have come to think of myself in those terms too…part of the collective. I am one of the sons of God, I am part of the Bride of Christ, I am Christian sister, I am just a part of the body. I have come to appreciate that I am one of many and that I am not that special. The Lord cares for all His children and He is not a respecter of persons. What He will do for one, He will do for another. This is good and right in every way. The Word tells us that if one part of the body suffers, we all suffer (1 Cor. 12:26).
Psalm 23, verse 5 reads “You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You have anointed and refreshed my head with oil; my cup overflows.” (Amp)
Many times, as I have meditated on this psalm, I would imagine this table. It would always be this long, wooden table, set with beautiful cutlery and crockery, absolutely laden with food. I would see fruit and vegetables, steaming bowls with delicious dishes, roasts and whole fish baked with their heads on, and pitchers with delicious drinks waiting to be savoured. As you can tell, I have a vivid imagination and I love to watch period films, which probably informed my imagination. On this long, communal table there would be something to satisfy every possible taste, because we are all loved after all.
Then I had a dream in which I was the bride at a wedding. As I walked across a beautifully manicured lawn, around a peaceful lake I noticed the wedding guests sitting around the lake, totally relaxed. I was walking towards the tent where a beautiful buffet was laid out and as I was walking towards it, I was conversing with my angel. I said “this is nothing like the wedding I had planned, but it is so much better”. I could see the elegant, formal wedding I had planned in my mind’s eye but my bridegroom gave me the wedding that I needed, not what I thought I wanted. As I walked up to the tables, I noticed it was laden with treats and desserts. There was everything I could imagine to satisfy my sweet tooth. Only someone who knew everything about me would know that I am easily won over with a sweet treat and that I rate the quality of a meal by the dessert.
As I passed some guests, I noticed a dessert that I am particularly fond of on their plates. I missed it the first time round! I went back to get it and to my astonishment found that everything had been replaced by desserts even more delectable than before. The miracle at the wedding comes to mind…the best was served last.
This dream was such a comfort to me and still brings a smile to my face as it is a reminder that there’s a place with Jesus where I am just Nicky, His beloved. In this place there’s no expectation that I be anything other than loved. There’s a communal table where we all eat, but there is also a table where Jesus serves me everything that will bless my heart. That buffet of dessert was not about feeding me, or keeping my fueled and healthy. That table was all about making me happy, showing me that I am know and loved for who I am and that I have a Bridegroom who desires to show me His love in a language that I would understand. At this table there is no judgment about my poor choices or my lack of discipline. Yes, Jesus calls us to serve as He served but there is also a place where He want to serve us…He wants to serve us with the things that reminds us we are known, loved and accepted regardless of what we believe about ourselves. Jesus wants us to know that we have each been called by our own name, not as the collective “we” or “you” but as individuals.
How marvelous to comprehend that the One who holds all things together knows little old me. And not only that, but that He cares about me and that the things I care about matter to Him. Song of Solomon 6:3 in the Passion Translation reads: He is within me—I am his garden of delight. I have him fully and now he fully has me!
For many of us 2020 hasn’t turned out at all as we had hoped in January but take courage because Jesus is still King and you, beloved, hold this King’s heart.