Now it came to pass, when the time had come for Him to be received up, that He steadfastly set His face to go to Jerusalem, and sent messengers before His face. And as they went, they entered a village of the Samaritans, to prepare for Him. But they did not receive Him, because His face was set for the journey to Jerusalem. And when His disciples James and John saw this, they said, “Lord, do You want us to command fire to come down from heaven and consume them, just as Elijah did?”But He turned and rebuked them, and said, “You do not know what manner of spirit you are of. For the Son of Man did not come to destroy men’s lives but to save them.” And they went to another village.  Luke 9: 51 – 56 NKJV

Have you disappointed someone lately?  Has someone disappointed you?  It’s part of the human condition, isn’t it?  In our fast paced world it’s expected that we would be available and accessible all the time.  

In the scripture I opened with, we read of an incident where Jesus didn’t just disappoint His disciples, He went as far as to insult them even.  That must have stung on many levels.  On more than one occasion Jesus predicted His death which must have confused His disciples greatly.  They were expecting a great leader, a man of military might who would overthrow the Romans and set them free from the oppression they were living under.  Yet Jesus arrives on the scene and looks nothing like what they expected the Messiah to look like.  

The Bible is brimming with examples of God saying “no”.  There are also numerous examples of Jesus saying “no” loud and clear.  In Luke 15, verse 16, we read “But Jesus Himself would often slip away to the wilderness and pray [in seclusion].  (Amp). Jesus gave His disciples the gift of no and He put a clear boundary around people’s demands on Him.   

In Matthew 12 there’s a passage that seems counterintuitive, especially in the light of Jesus’ concern for His mother, as demonstrated at the time of His crucifixion, when He charged John with taking care of Mary.   

Let’s read from verse  46 to 50.  “While He was still talking to the crowds, it happened that His mother and brothers stood outside, asking to speak to Him. Someone said to Him, “Look! Your mother and Your brothers are standing outside asking to speak to You.” But Jesus replied to the one who told Him, “Who is My mother and who are My brothers?” And stretching out His hand toward His disciples [and all His other followers], He said, “Here are My mother and My brothers! For whoever does the will of My Father who is in heaven [by believing in Me, and following Me] is My brother and sister and mother.”

I don’t believe Jesus was saying no because of a lack of love or concern for His family.  That would have been inconceivable for Him and we know His character was faultless.  I believe Jesus said a clear “no” to the entitlement of His natural family because He was on a mission from His Heavenly Father.  To say yes to them, would mean choosing to disappoint His Father and He was making a point as to His own priority.  He was about His Father’s business and He wouldn’t even allow His nearest and dearest to interrupt that.

There’s a lesson for us too.  Every time we say yes to something, we are inevitably saying no to something else.  Regardless of how hard we try, how pure our motives are, how much we love and care for people, the truth is that somewhere, somehow we are going to disappoint someone.  The key is to disappoint the right people.

We have to understand that we are going to be faced with choices and our choices have consequences…some of those decisions may alter the trajectory of someone else’s life forever.  For the father saying yes to work at the expense of his children, for the husband or wife saying yes to an adulterous relationship at the expense of their spouse, for the pastor or leader saying yes to religious activity at the expense of their own intimacy with the Lord…there will be natural and spiritual consequences and each one of us will be held accountable.  Until we understand that we are on a mission too…to be and to make disciples…we are going to disappoint the wrong Person.

 3 For His divine power has bestowed on us [absolutely] everything necessary for  [dynamic spiritual] life and godliness, through true and personal knowledge of Him who called us by His own glory and excellence. 4 For by these He has bestowed on us His precious and magnificent promises [of inexpressible value], so that by them you may escape from the immoral freedom that is in the world because of disreputable desire, and become sharers of the divine nature. 5 For this very reason, applying your diligence [to the divine promises, make every effort] in [exercising] your faith to, develop moral excellence, and in moral excellence, knowledge (insight, understanding), 6 and in your knowledge, self-control, and in your self-control, steadfastness, and in your steadfastness, godliness, 7 and in your godliness, brotherly affection, and in your brotherly affection, [develop Christian] love [that is, learn to unselfishly seek the best for others and to do things for their benefit]. 8 For as these qualities are yours and are increasing [in you as you grow toward spiritual maturity], they will keep you from being useless and unproductive in regard to the true knowledge and greater understanding of our Lord Jesus Christ. 2 Peter 1:3 – 8 AMP

Let’s get comfortable with giving  and receiving the gift of “no”.  Let us release whoever and whatever is distracting us from growing into the maturity our Lord Jesus is calling us into, and let’s give one another the freedom to be everything they are called to be, even if it means dealing with disappointment ourselves.